Matt Gwynne and Amber Bowles made a bold move to find love when they met at the altar on Lifetime’s Married at First Sight. Their relationship got off to a great start on their honeymoon in Antigua. However, it wasn’t long after they moved into their new home in Charlotte that reality set in.
Last week’s episode ended with a bombshell that no one expected. A devastated Amber sobbed on film, “It’s two o’clock in the morning. Matt hasn’t come home. I care about my husband and I want to know that he’s safe. He has not texted me or called me back and his phone now is going straight to voicemail.”
Amber was sad and hurt by Matt’s actions. My heart ached for her as she agonized, “I feel like my husband doesn’t care about me at all.” In fact, it affected Amber so deeply that she was unable to sleep and had to miss a day of work. The last straw for her was finding Matt’s wedding ring in the nightstand drawer.
When Matt walked through the door the next afternoon, I expected (Elizabeth Bice style) fireworks. But that’s not what happened.
Instead, Amber calmly stated how unhappy she was. Matt made excuses about falling back into his previous single lifestyle. “In the past, it’s kind of like what me and my buddies do. We crash on each other’s couches,” he said.
After Matt apologized and promised to do better, the couple smiled and embraced.
~Record screech~ What???
At that moment, social media exploded. Fans did NOT understand how Amber could forgive Matt so quickly. In this exclusive interview, I had the chance to dig a little deeper and ask Amber to expound on that.
“I forgave Matt because I didn’t think that I had communicated my expectations to him properly. I felt like I [wanted to] give him another chance to respect my boundaries once I communicated those to him,” she told RealiTVwithBee.
Married at First Sight sociologist, Dr. Pepper Schwartz, met with the couple and later revealed on camera, “After talking to Amber, I actually don’t think she is holding Matt accountable enough to his actions. Matt is her husband and he owes her more respect then he is currently giving her.”
I asked Amber to reflect on what Dr. Pepper said. “I agree with Dr. Pepper that I didn’t hold Matt accountable for him staying out all night,” she answered. She explained further, “Matt didn’t communicate [to me] his plan to stay out. As a newlywed, with only a limited time to get to know his spouse, he should have incorporated me into his plans for the night.”
With adversity comes growth. Amber shared the insight she gained, “I learned from this specific experience that my abandonment issues do play a part in how I act in relationships and the boundaries I have with my husband.” This is something she has admittedly been working on.
Another thing Amber learned was that Matt’s expectations within their marriage are way different than hers. Communication and respect are key.
There are no do-overs in life, but if Amber could change one thing, it would be, “to sit down with Matt prior to this happening and have a conversation about boundaries. I don’t think Matt realized in that moment, how his lack of communication and [his] not coming home affected me,” she shared.
What impact will this have on their marriage moving forward? In an effort to please Amber, Matt set up a table to surprise her with a sensual massage. Right now he seems remorseful, but time will tell.